My 2nd child is to be baptized on Sept 17, 2011
I cannot believe I am old enough to have 3 kids let alone a 10 year old, an 8 year old and a soon to be 6 year old with one on the way in Oct. We are very blessed with amazingly good, bright, talented children!! Ben has been anxiously awaiting to be baptized since Mina was two years ago. It's finally his turn and it seems that all our great planning was undone by the miraculous surprise of a fourth child this year. instead of travelling up to Utah and having Ben baptized with most our family, we are unable to travel and have to have it here in Arizona. So far only a few family members can make it, but we really will take whatever we can get! I just want Ben to feel special, and know how proud I... we are of him. He is growing into an extraordinary young man. and yes he still has those amazingly long eyelashes and big beautiful brown eyes that get him pretty much anything he wants! ha! Not to mention his innate and exquisite negotiating skills. (I can't imagine where he got that from hahaha!) I am proud.... proud to be a mother. Proud to be a wife. In all my life in the pursuit of feminine rights, I never thought this would be the life I would ultimately want or choose. But... Jason was different than other men I had met. He melted my heart with an over abundance of love and yet kept the respect for my need to individuality. he loved... loves my strong spirit and supports my desires in anything I pursue. He encouraged me to at least finish my associates degree and helped me pursue my Bachelor until for a time it became too much to pursue. He is willing at anytime to help me find a way back knowing my ultimate goal is a doctorate...(kids and timing allowing of course) But in the meantime, he has patiently endured and supported my need of accomplishment and picked up the slack I left while pursuing a career in opera and music. I did love the people I'd met and worked with and will go back someday, but looking at it from the eyes of my children I knew I needed to take a break and be a mom. I never regret that decision. I know many people look at it as a defeat or that I'm giving up and wasting my potential. But... I did not become a mother just to do it halfway. I will not be half in and half out on this job... yes JOB. Motherhood is the most important job a woman can have seeing as we are raising future leaders. I was sick when I realized I was part of a society that no longer cares about morals and values enough to teach them to their own kids. A society that instead of remaining involved in the raising and educating of their children leaves it to television and other electronics, or other people. A society where homes and material things are worth more to them than the relationships of their family. Children do not know their parents because they are placed in daycare from birth, then school, then kicked out to college or whatever, without being properly prepared. But then we as adults are angry they don't turn out the way we expect. How ridiculous! If we are to change this society, we must again become active parents. Children are not dolls to dress up for family pictures once a year and claim on taxes only to be ignored and sent away for the remainder of the time. They are human beings, amazing creations unmatched by anything in the modern science world today! The miracle of their life is obvious alone in the genetic make-up of the body... prevalent in the far advanced functions and the untapped potential of the human brain. Whether we like to admit it or not, these young people are learning everything there is to know about us and our behaviors simply by watching us. They are becoming us, down to our very last flaw. So.. a society that lives with the belief that consequences don't apply to our generation is in turn teaching the younger generation there are no consequences. Eventually leading our society into a downward spiral inevitably leading to a crash of depression era proportions. Surprised? We shouldn't be... history repeats itself again and again. As a human race however, we do have the hope of recovery and again the establishment of morals, values, and industry as well as a renewed sense of responsibility. All this renewal and hope is impossible until people realize the need to return to simplicity. The turning back to our instinctual nature and becoming what we as humans were initially intended for... family grouping. Yes, the basic animalistic structure of families. Parents teaching children proper behavior, fulfilling emotional and physical needs, and preparing them for life as the cycles repeat. Interestingly enough, for any higher brain functions we humans posses over animals you never see the animal kingdom plummet into chaos... without our interference obviously. Yet we as a civilized society crash again and again. It comes down to choice, pure and simply. We choose to ignore common cause and effect, we justify and rationalize, crash, then turn back again to basic instinct only to start the process over time and time again. Anyway, that is my perspective on life take it or leave it. That is why I feel so strongly about being a stay home mother if at all possible, and why I feel such a heavy weight of responsibility upon my shoulders as a mom. Is what I'm doing enough to prepare them for the society they will be dealing with in their generation? Is it enough to help them understand the importance of parenthood and give them the skills they need to become active parents? I won't know until they themselves become the parents.. but I can hope and pray that each day I try... I get one day closer to bettering their future. Each time I make the choice to forgo a selfish desire to teach a principle, or provide for the future generations needs, I teach them how important they really are. Obviously no one is perfect, but at least I know... even if no one else ever sees the importance of my work as a mom.. that what I did for my children had meaning. My sacrifices will not be in vain. I will not be remembered on a plaque, or my name placed on any beautiful architecture, and no one may even remember me after I leave this world. But, hopefully my children will grow with the knowledge that they were loved and they were more important to me than anything else this world had to offer. Hopefully.. that is enough.
I cannot believe I am old enough to have 3 kids let alone a 10 year old, an 8 year old and a soon to be 6 year old with one on the way in Oct. We are very blessed with amazingly good, bright, talented children!! Ben has been anxiously awaiting to be baptized since Mina was two years ago. It's finally his turn and it seems that all our great planning was undone by the miraculous surprise of a fourth child this year. instead of travelling up to Utah and having Ben baptized with most our family, we are unable to travel and have to have it here in Arizona. So far only a few family members can make it, but we really will take whatever we can get! I just want Ben to feel special, and know how proud I... we are of him. He is growing into an extraordinary young man. and yes he still has those amazingly long eyelashes and big beautiful brown eyes that get him pretty much anything he wants! ha! Not to mention his innate and exquisite negotiating skills. (I can't imagine where he got that from hahaha!) I am proud.... proud to be a mother. Proud to be a wife. In all my life in the pursuit of feminine rights, I never thought this would be the life I would ultimately want or choose. But... Jason was different than other men I had met. He melted my heart with an over abundance of love and yet kept the respect for my need to individuality. he loved... loves my strong spirit and supports my desires in anything I pursue. He encouraged me to at least finish my associates degree and helped me pursue my Bachelor until for a time it became too much to pursue. He is willing at anytime to help me find a way back knowing my ultimate goal is a doctorate...(kids and timing allowing of course) But in the meantime, he has patiently endured and supported my need of accomplishment and picked up the slack I left while pursuing a career in opera and music. I did love the people I'd met and worked with and will go back someday, but looking at it from the eyes of my children I knew I needed to take a break and be a mom. I never regret that decision. I know many people look at it as a defeat or that I'm giving up and wasting my potential. But... I did not become a mother just to do it halfway. I will not be half in and half out on this job... yes JOB. Motherhood is the most important job a woman can have seeing as we are raising future leaders. I was sick when I realized I was part of a society that no longer cares about morals and values enough to teach them to their own kids. A society that instead of remaining involved in the raising and educating of their children leaves it to television and other electronics, or other people. A society where homes and material things are worth more to them than the relationships of their family. Children do not know their parents because they are placed in daycare from birth, then school, then kicked out to college or whatever, without being properly prepared. But then we as adults are angry they don't turn out the way we expect. How ridiculous! If we are to change this society, we must again become active parents. Children are not dolls to dress up for family pictures once a year and claim on taxes only to be ignored and sent away for the remainder of the time. They are human beings, amazing creations unmatched by anything in the modern science world today! The miracle of their life is obvious alone in the genetic make-up of the body... prevalent in the far advanced functions and the untapped potential of the human brain. Whether we like to admit it or not, these young people are learning everything there is to know about us and our behaviors simply by watching us. They are becoming us, down to our very last flaw. So.. a society that lives with the belief that consequences don't apply to our generation is in turn teaching the younger generation there are no consequences. Eventually leading our society into a downward spiral inevitably leading to a crash of depression era proportions. Surprised? We shouldn't be... history repeats itself again and again. As a human race however, we do have the hope of recovery and again the establishment of morals, values, and industry as well as a renewed sense of responsibility. All this renewal and hope is impossible until people realize the need to return to simplicity. The turning back to our instinctual nature and becoming what we as humans were initially intended for... family grouping. Yes, the basic animalistic structure of families. Parents teaching children proper behavior, fulfilling emotional and physical needs, and preparing them for life as the cycles repeat. Interestingly enough, for any higher brain functions we humans posses over animals you never see the animal kingdom plummet into chaos... without our interference obviously. Yet we as a civilized society crash again and again. It comes down to choice, pure and simply. We choose to ignore common cause and effect, we justify and rationalize, crash, then turn back again to basic instinct only to start the process over time and time again. Anyway, that is my perspective on life take it or leave it. That is why I feel so strongly about being a stay home mother if at all possible, and why I feel such a heavy weight of responsibility upon my shoulders as a mom. Is what I'm doing enough to prepare them for the society they will be dealing with in their generation? Is it enough to help them understand the importance of parenthood and give them the skills they need to become active parents? I won't know until they themselves become the parents.. but I can hope and pray that each day I try... I get one day closer to bettering their future. Each time I make the choice to forgo a selfish desire to teach a principle, or provide for the future generations needs, I teach them how important they really are. Obviously no one is perfect, but at least I know... even if no one else ever sees the importance of my work as a mom.. that what I did for my children had meaning. My sacrifices will not be in vain. I will not be remembered on a plaque, or my name placed on any beautiful architecture, and no one may even remember me after I leave this world. But, hopefully my children will grow with the knowledge that they were loved and they were more important to me than anything else this world had to offer. Hopefully.. that is enough.
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